What Do Monster and eHarmony Have in Common? They Both Sell Hope.

I'm married and gainfully employed. Not exactly the target demographic for either company. But the current campaigns for both Monster.com and eHarmony simply cannot pass without mention. After wondering why the two stood out, I realized one simple truth: They both sell hope to the masses.

Let's look at Monster first. They've been coming at us with clever commercials for years. The memorable "When I grow up" series was good. "Never settle" was a great tagline. But I'm a big fan of the new "Today's The Day" message. It's filled with expectation and optimism that's infectious - even to non jobseekers. If you've seen any of these energetic TV commercials (which, sadly, I cannot seem to locate anywhere online) you know what I'm talking about. Anyone who's ever landed a job they really wanted can relate to the candidates dancing in celebration of the news. That's marketing. That's great marketing. It's happy. It's inspiring. And best of all - I never forget that it's Monster selling us that dream of hope.

On to eHarmony...

I'm a long-time skeptic of online dating. I live with the belief that it is an amazing tool for "other people," just not me. I have no reason to dislike them, it just never appealed to me as a desirable way to find a date. Because of this, I used to fast forward through the eHarmony TV spots without delay. But something changed a few years back when it's founder, Dr. Neil Clark Warren started showing up on camera.

It doesn't always work when a frontman steps in front of the lens, and Dr. Warren has certainly drawn plenty of fire and satire for his appearances. But it made me slow down and listen to the message. His goal was obviously to build trust and credibility. To make is seem less like art and more like science. Today's eHarmony commercials all clearly focus on the success rate of finding "the one" by joining. Even I get excited for the people in the commercials who seem so blissful. But as Jim has so eloquently pointed out, statistically your chances of marriage don't really improve when you join eHarmony. In fact, you're just about as likely to find a mate without signing up. But they're not selling statistics. They're selling hope. Plain and simple. And the cosmetics industry is any example, people will wait in line all day and pay big bucks for hope.

It isn't that these services don't work for some (or many). They do. But much like buying lottery tickets, people tend to look at these as the solution to a problem rather than the tools that they actually are. Posting your resume or personal profile online is much better than sitting at home on Saturday night unemployed and alone. But it doesn't replace picking up the phone and meeting as many people as you can. If signing up for services like these makes you feel better and you begin to expect success, I believe you're far more likely to recognize it when you meet it. This is precisely the nudge it takes to get some people off the couch. If that's you, by all means sign up and get out there. There's nothing wrong with "buying hope," just don't expect it to come in a bottle and cure all that ails you.